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30 Jul

How 60 – 90 minutes/week can affect your marriage or . . .

Dr. Bill Rudd Blog 0 0

Roger recently saw a FACEBOOK post on “HOW TO IMPROVE YOUR MARRIAGE.”

Roger decided that he needs to work on his marriage. It’s not that he and Glenda are having any major problems, but their marriage isn’t very exciting, romantic, intimate, or fulfilling. They take each other for granted. They aren’t usually fighting, but they aren’t very close either. Sometimes it seems that they’re more like brother and sister than husband and wife.

So, Roger decides to do something about it. He makes a plan to attempt to renew his marriage. Then he gets with Glenda to share his marriage renewal plan with her.

“Okay, Honey, I’ve decided that I need to do something to bring the spark back into our marriage, something that will turn us back into honeymooners.”

“Wow!”Glenda responds with a bit of skepticism. “Let’s hear it.”

“Okay, here’s my plan. Every Saturday morning, I’m going to set aside an hour and a half to spend with you. I’ll set aside everything else I could spend that time on and will give her my full attention. Of course, once in a while, something more important may come up, but most Saturdays, I’ll be there.”

“Now, the rest of the week, you know I’m pretty busy. With my job, my hobbies, and a lot of other things I’ve got going, other than maybe eating supper together a couple of times a week while we watch TV, I can’t spend a lot of time with you. But on Saturday morning, we’ll have 90 minutes together. It will be great. What do you think?”

Glenda replies, “Let me see if I got this right. You think that our marriage needs some work so, you’re going to pretty much ignore me all week but give me 90 minutes on Saturday morning as long as something more important doesn’t come up. Is that about right?”

Do you think Roger’s plan is going to help their marriage?

Saturday rolls around and Roger, looking at his watch, says to his wife, ”Look Honey, I know I haven’t had any time for you this week, but it’s Saturday again and we’ve got 90 minutes starting now.”

How do you think Glenda feels about this?

Compare this to someone’s relationship with God. Their plan is to spend time/worship God once every week on Sunday morning — like they’re doing Him a big favor– but pretty much ignore Him the rest of the week. How strong will their relationship with God be? What does it suggest if someone pretty much ignores God all week but shows up for church for 60 or 90 minutes on Sunday . . . as long as something more important doesn’t come up?

On the other hand, imagine that Roger is intentional all week long about talking with Glenda, spending time with her, doing things to please her, and then on Saturday morning says, “It’s been wonderful spending time with you this week. I can hardly wait to spend the next 90 minutes celebrating our relationship!” 

How do you think Glenda feels about that?

If you want a strong marriage and a vibrant relationship with God, it takes more than a 60-90 minutes slot.

Worship is a 24/7 lifestyle which involves living intentionally in the presence of God with the goal of living out Jesus’ teachings and example in my relationships and priorities.


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